It took me a long time to understand that it was okay to say “No” and set boundaries. Growing up I always felt that I had to do everything and be everywhere for all the people around me. To a point where I started doing things not because I wanted to but because I felt like I had to as to not disappoint anybody. If I was asked to do something for school, volunteering, temple, family or friends the answer always had to be yes.
Although I haven’t perfected the art of saying “No” just yet I’d like to say I’ve had significant improvement in doing so. A few things that have helped me in improving my ability are:
- Listening to my body, specifically listening to when I get a gut feeling.
- For events or tasks, instead of saying yes reluctantly I ask them if I can take a day or two to look at my schedule to see if I’m able to attend or complete the task.
Setting boundaries has allowed me the freedom to learn more about myself. It allowed me the autonomy to choose what I wanted to do without feeling guilty about letting other people down. Although it can be tough sometimes, it’s possible.