On April 4 I was interviewed by Dr. Cynthia Toolin-Wilson of WCAT TV regarding my upcoming book, Don’t Plant Your Seeds Among Thorns: A Catholic’s Guide to Domestic Abuse. The title of my book is based on Jeremiah 4:3 and reflects the truth of abusive relationships; where love is neglected, fruitfulness is impossible unless real change and healing is achieved.
Healing from the damage of domestic abuse is tremendously fruitful, yet it does take work, commitment, and guidance from the Holy Spirit. No matter how old or young you are—and no matter how old or new your trauma is—complete healing and restoration is possible! Christ has risen, and He can help you learn to rise as well, from whatever weighs you down. Talitha cumi!
“The Catholic Church defines marriage as a continuous act of mutual self-giving,” I point out in the interview. “That’s what marriage should be—a beautiful giving of self because you can be vulnerable. In a marriage you have to be vulnerable; if you can’t be vulnerable you don’t really have a marriage, and certainly self-giving is impossible. Mutual self-giving is giving your strengths to your partner, and your partner giving his strengths to you; likewise you give your weaknesses so you can share in both. In an abusive relationship you can’t give your vulnerability because it will be taken advantage of. You can’t show your weaknesses because they will get thrown back in your face. The ability to mutually self-give as the Catholic Church defines marriage is impossible.”
Yet here is hope, there is healing, and change is possible. What does change look like? In an abusive victim, it’s a metamorphosis from victim to survivor, a renewal of self and soul.
I invite you to listen to my interview with Dr. Cynthia Toolin-Wilson, where we discuss various aspects of domestic abuse and healing.